Good Love vs. Bad Love

Is there a difference between Good and Bad Love?


February is Teen Dating Violence awareness month. Did you know that 1 in 3 teens has been abused in a dating relationship?


If you have kids, think about your child and two of their friends together. One of them is likely to have already been abused, or will be. I don’t know about you, but that’s just wrong to me on so many levels. I have a fourteen year old, and we talk about it often. I make sure she knows the signs of abuse, and I watch her carefully when she not only talks about herself, but about her friends.

Did you know that only 1 in 9 will seek help? WHAT? One in nine! And with that only 33% of abused teens have ever told anyone. So three out of 9 told someone, but those other two who didn’t get help probably made the person they told promise not to say anything. I mean, teens like secrets, and swearing on each others privacy, right? Oh, no!

Abuse isn’t something to keep secret. Nope. Not when you are 6, 12, 18, 23, 37, 49, or 70. Abuse is never okay to keep secret.


But let’s talk about some of the signs of Teen Dating Abuse. This is a list of WARNING SIGNS:

  • Checking your cell phone or email without permission (Digital Abuse)
  • Constantly putting you down
  • Extreme jealousy or insecurity
  • Explosive temper
  • Isolating you from family or friends (HUGE WARNING SIGN)
  • Making false accusations
  • Mood swings
  • Physically hurting you in any way
  • Possessiveness
  • Telling you what to do

Let me just give you a few facts to keep in mind:

  • Girls and young women between the ages of 16 and 24 experience the highest rate of intimate partner violence, almost triple the national average.
  • Among female victims of intimate partner violence, 94% of those age 16-19 and 70% of those age 20-24 were victimized by a current or former boyfriend or girlfriend.
  • Violent behavior often begins between the ages of 12 and 18.

So what do you do if you think your child, or your friends child is being abuse?


To them, their parents, a teacher, someone who can help that young person see that what is happening is abusive and they do not deserve that. Because let’s face it, victims think they deserve it. I did. I know a lot of other survivors who say they thought the same thing. So we need to make sure they know they are not the cause, they are the victim.

Want more information? Check out? where they talk in depth about dating violence and abuse. They have some great resources there, too! They also have a QUICK EXIT in case you’re a victim who is looking for help and your abuser shows up in the room.

Here are two quizzes they offer to see if you are in a healthy relationship or advice on how you can help.

Like this one – A Healthy Relationship Quiz!

Or this one – How Would You Help?

Author Stacy Eaton is a very strong Advocate of Domestic Violence Awareness and helping victims to be come survivors. She herself is a survivor and has written several books dealing with the intense subject: Whether I’ll Live or Die, You’re Not Alone and Barbara’s Plea, along with a New Adult story about finding confidence in yourself, Finding the Strength.

You’re Not Alone has been Released!

It’s Official ~ You’re Not Alone has been released and for one week only it will at $0.99!

Don’t forget to view the Video Trailer!? It’s Intense!

Early Amazon Reviews

“I won’t lie, this book is intense! Writing about domestic abuse has got to be a tough thing to do, but experiencing it has got to be even tougher. Stacy Eaton blew me away, once again.”

“This is another emotional and powerful story about domestic abuse, and how victims can start a new life, knowing that there?s hope and they are, indeed, are not alone. ”

“It is hard to categorize this story into a particular genre. There is suspense, police procedure, domestic abuse and an amazing love story.”

“This book is so much more than a romance. With strong compelling characters, it shows the long term impacts of domestic violence on women as well as men.”

To say this was a great book when it?s about domestic violence seems wrong but it was so good. It was a real eye opener to what domestic violence is and what it can do to women. The author does a fantastic job of explaining the different types of violence and how it effects women in the story and yet make it a beautiful story about true love.

You’re Not Alone is an emotional, inspiring story of a woman and a man, both of whom have survived abuse in their life, finding each other and finding happiness together. The author drew me into this book from the very first chapter – she teases the reader with the possibility of recognition between the Trinity and Gavin – and makes the reader NEED to read on.

As the story unfolds your heart will fill with the love that Gavin shows her, and how Trinity comes to trust Gavin, and even herself – to fall in love again. But the DV scenes will have you tied in knots.
When you have never suffered any kind of abuse – mental or physical – it is hard to understand how others put up with it. But reading Stacy’s books helps you grasp how the partner cuts them off from their family and friends, belittles them until they feel worthless and believe all the untrue and unkind words that are spat at them, and possibly even makes them believe they deserve the beating, due to something they have or haven’t done. This book certainly opened my eyes.

To purchase You’re not Alone!


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Writing about Domestic Violence

Over the last few years, I have written three books that deal with domestic violence. My first story, Whether I’ll Live or Die was published in 2012.? My second was Barbara’s Plea and it was released on April 10, 2015. There is a third one that will come out in a few months, that one is called You’re Not Alone.

There is a difference between all three of these books. Whether I’ll Live or Die delves deep into the domestic violence as you follow Amanda through her abusive relationship. Barbara’s Plea is about a woman who escapes with her daughter to survive and You’re Not Alone deals with a woman ten years after she was almost killed by her abusive husband. While there are major difference in these three books, there are some very serious similarities.

For those of you who don’t know me, I’m a police officer and have been for 15 years. I also serve on the board of directors for my counties domestic violence center. I see both sides of abuse, from the abusers I arrest to the victims that I attempt to protect. I see the woman who are battered, the children who are subjected to the trauma and the men who are afraid to come forward. Abuse targets no specific gender, and while all three of my stories do have women as the victims, I will in time bring to life the story of a male victim.

One of the most frustrating and aggravating questions that is asked is why doesn’t a victim leave. That is such a hard question to answer, because there is so much at play. As an outsider, you have no idea of the threats that have been given. You don’t know how finances are controlled. You have no real knowledge of how much control the abuser has over a victim, and let me tell you, they have a lot of control.? An abuser can control a few things, or everything in a victims life. They can be the only voice in the household that carries weight, and the only one who can make decisions. What they say is law within the walls of their home.

Most relationships don’t start out abusive. Abusers take time to groom and court the victims. They earn their trust and slowly chip away at their self esteem and confidence. They verbally abuse the victim subtly at first and the victim might question if the abuser is right or not. Over time, the victim will stop questioning the abuser and start believing the words that leave their tainted mouth. Victims will look in the mirror and and not see the actual face that stares back at them, rather they will see the stupid, ignorant, worthless, fat, ugly person that they have been told they are.? We all know that if someone says something enough to you, you’ll start to believe it. You’ll even start to think their way sometimes. So imagine what might go through a victims mind if they are told this over and over again. If they are distanced from their family, pulled away from their friends and the only words they hear are the nasty words out of an abusers mouth.

One of the points that I try to make in my stories is that even when the victim gains their freedom, the abuse does not stop. Inside their minds and hearts it will live on.? I have had people comment on how Amanda in Whether I’ll Live or Die was weak. Damn right she was. Once upon a time, she was a fun loving person who loved life, but her circumstances and the abuse she received, over and over again changed her. Years later, Amanda still dealt with residual effects of that abuse, even when she was in a healthy stable relationship.

In You’re Not Alone, which will release later this year, Trinity Morris is woman who is a true survivor. It is ten years after her husband almost killed her, and yet, she still deals with the insecurities that he conditioned her too. I had someone question me on that, saying don’t you think that it’s odd that she keeps questioning herself as she finally allows herself to love again. The answer to that question is, No. There is nothing odd about that. Just because a victim is free of their abuser does not mean that they don’t question almost everything that is said to them. It doesn’t mean that five, ten, twenty years down the line a single sentence said by a loved one won’t slam them right back into a PTSD moment and they are reliving it all again.

It happens. It’s real. It is a victim’s own personal nightmare that can come to life years after the abuse stops.

In these books, I write from the heart. I have cried while I have written scenes, I have walked away from my computer in the middle of a sentence because I needed to take a break. I don’t gloss over the cold hard facts. There is more of a need to put those facts out there. There is a need for people to understand what a victim goes through, during and after. I want people to understand that abuse can happen to anyone, you, your neighbor, your mother, your father, your sister, your brother, your son, your daughter, your best friend, your co-worker or your neighbor. It doesn’t matter what color your skin is. It doesn’t care how much is in your bank account or what kind of car you drive.? It makes no difference if you are a teenager or an elderly person. Abuse knows no bounds.

I have had many people reach out to me and tell me thank you for writing these books. I have had people tell me they cried, they yelled and they sometimes had to put the books down and walk away for a little while. I’ve had family members of victims read them and tell me that they finally have some understanding of what someone they love went through. I have had victims write me and thank me for giving voice to their stories.

I write this stories for the victims, for the ones that have survived and for the ones that haven’t. I write these stories not only to entertain, but to educate. I write these stories so that a voice is given to all of those people who can not speak. I write these stories because at one time, I lived it.

To learn more about Whether I’ll Live or Die, click here.

To learn more about Barbara’s Plea, click here.

To learn more about You’re Not Alone, click here.